#i need a snack ive been drawing all day

[tonypostt]

a birthday gift for my good friend @kafus !!! it's so insane to have known you for almost 5 years now . you already saw this on discord but you can see it again here

[evans23]

Daughter of mine II

Pairing : Judge Turpin x Daughter OC

Summary : The great judge Turpin tries to adapt to his new role as a father. Awkward, he doesn't realise that his daughter doesn't find her place in this new world.

Tag(s)/Warning(s) : A bit of angst I guess. Mention of prostitution and death. Awkward father. If I forget something, please mention it to me !

A/N: Hello dear 😁 Here the next part of Daughter of mine. Enjoy !

Part I - Part III - Part IV - Part V

Also read on AO3

The first days were awkward, to say the least. Catherine was intimidated by her new surroundings and Turpin didn't know how to be a father. He didn't really try either. He didn't have any good paternal figure when he was a kid, his father being the kind violent. Besides, he couldn't stop thinking it would have been easier if he had been in the child's life from the beginning. 

Not only did he have to catch up with six years of his daughter's life, almost seven, which was utterly impossible, but also, he wasn't sure how to impose his authority on his daughter. His daughter... Even this word sounded strange to him. 

It had only been two weeks since the girl had moved in with him, in his mansion. The servants were totally enamoured with the child, who was reserved and overly polite. She never asked for anything and ate everything that was served to her, even when it was obvious she didn't like what was on her plate. Fortunately, her governess could read the little girl far more easily than her dad, and each time she noticed an imperceptible grimace of disgust, she warned the cook not to prepare this food for the child anymore. 

True to his words, two days after her arrival, Catherine got a tutor. In fact, more than one. One of the teachers had for a mission was to teach her how to write, read, and speak properly, like a well-mannered lady should do. Another one was there to teach her to speak French and Italian and another one to provide some music and drawing skills.

She probably should learn how to dance, sew, and many other things a mother would judge necessary for his daughter to know, but Turpin wasn't a mother, scarcely a father, and those trivial competencies weren't what mattered the most for Turpin. He wanted a well-educated daughter, with knowledge in his head and not just an empty brain as too much lady of his acquaintance. Turpin was a conservator, yes, but he knew how important it was to be able to think by itself, even for a girl, even more for his daughter !

The triviality would be learned later, when he decided it was time to introduce her to the high society, in a timely manner. For the moment, there was no place for any leisure. Anyway, the hectic schedule of Catherine didn't leave any room for that. She had a tiring day like she had never experienced before. 

She had to wake up at seven o'clock, half past six sometimes, and be ready with the help of her maid before eight. She had a light breakfast before the start of her courses, which only stopped once at noon to let her the time to have lunch and then at half past four in the afternoon. From half past four to five, she had some time to play on her own but she had to be quite imaginative, for there were no toys for her. Not because Turpin was too stingy but because it hadn't crossed his mind that the girl could need more than pretty dresses and coats. 

However, Catherine was so happy with those beautiful clothes that she wore them with unconcealed joy as she had never had new clothes before, even less expensive and elegant dresses like these one but only the old ones of her mother who took up it as best as she could, that she didn't dare ask for more. 

In addition, she had three meals a day, water at will, tea in the morning, and even orange juice and snacks during the day if she wished to. But what delighted her the most was the hot cocoa her governess brought her every night before sleep. A beverage her mother couldn't afford at all. Also, and for her biggest relief, she was allowed to keep her candles lit all night to make the terrifying shadows of her past disappear. And she knew how expensive was a candle, her mother told her so each time she asked to keep one alight for the night when she was alone and so afraid.

Unfortunately, despite all the affluence she was surrounded with, she felt alone. Terribly alone. She had no friends, wasn't allowed to go out, except for the backyard of the mansion, but anyway, it was too cold to play outside, but more than everything else, she missed her mom. She was also secretly longing for a father. But Richard didn't seem to appeal to the idea or at least, it was what she thought. 

Richard was never home. He left an hour before her waking time and came back far after her bedtime. He worked every day, including on Saturday morning, and during the afternoon, he was locked up in his office. The only room she was forbidden to enter in. Should she have been bolder, she would probably intruded into his sanctuary of peace to have the privilege of his company, but the natural severity emanating from the man was enough to keep her on track. 

Sunday was the only day during which she had breakfast with him, but he wasn't very talkative and she didn't know what to say to the man who, inevitably, dismissed her in her room or in the garden with her maid to let her have some clear air while he was, yet again, in his office, working on court cases or attempting some business with The Beadle. 

And because she couldn't have a piece of Richard, not necessarily his heart, not even his affection, even though she was in desperate need of a bit of that more than the beautiful dresses and the palatable food, she started to become sad. Sadder than she was when her mom died or when they were living in the paucity on the outskirts of London. Sadder than when she had lost her little cat, dead because he was starving and her mom couldn't buy enough food for the three of them, sadder than when she had been sent to the orphanage. 

In fact, she felt deceived by the man she had thought would be more than just his savior. The moment she had understood who he was, she had thought he would be his father, the one she had wished for on every birthday, and also for Christmas. She had begun to feel the need to fill in the hole in her heart with the presence of the man she had dreamt of. Moreover, the death of Elena, her dear mommy, had enlarged that hole, and the instant she had acknowledged Richard for who he was, she had wrongly thought he would embrace his role as a father. How stupid she had been. How a man who had left her mother with a broken heart could have loved her ?

The governess and the maids had already understood what the child was longing for. She needed her father's love to heal. However, Richard wasn't mean on purpose. He just didn't know how to step into the life of the child, how to take up his place as a father. Of course, he knew he just had to be himself, but the truth was that he was afraid to act like his father. Never could he forgive himself if his daughter was as afraid of him as he was of his own father when he was a child and even a young teenager. 

He had promised to himself, the day she arrived home, that never ever he would beat her, no matter her wrongdoings. Never she would hear the sound of a whip on her back and even less the feel of it. Nevertheless, he was a firm believer in the fact that a kid needed a sprinkle of authority. Even more than a sprinkle. 

Yet, he had to admit that she was easy to manage. She didn't run amok around the house and apparently, she didn't inherit the malicious and devious traits of the Turpin. Also, she never answered back, something Richard had done many times at the same age, which had owed him many slaps in the face. And surprisingly, he found himself wishing she would answer back because it would mean she was talking with him. In his presence, she was always silent and he didn't know if it was because she was impressed by him or just because she didn't adapt well to her new environment, but it was bothering him. 

"Sir, may I enquire how is doing the daughter of yours ?" asked The Beadle, that morning in the court office.

Richard looked down at him suspiciously. He didn't appreciate the attention Beadle thought necessary to have towards his daughter. He knew the man too well and didn't have any difficulties to figure out his intentions. He would be cold in his grave before a man like him could consider being betrothed to Catherine. The girl wouldn't have any suitor before her twenty-five. Or before his death. And he was able to defy God's authority on that matter just to be sure she wouldn't fall for a miserable like Beadle. A depraved man like him. In fact, after consideration, a man at all !

He dismissed The Beadle with a frown which said far more than his mouth. For God's sake, he thought, never come the day she would find man interesting. Not that they were all that bad, but Catherine's legacy would be substantial. Indeed, he had already found enough loopholes in the law to prevent his manor and all his wealth from being entailed to a stranger cousin he hadn't met in his life. All he knew about that man was that he was living in Australia with his wife and a son of sixteen named Elliott. 

"How is she ?" he asked as usual when he came back from the court to the maid.

"Asleep," answered merely the woman. 

She was the oldest maid of the manor, also the one who was able with Richard diplomatically enough to bring him around the right decision. 

"Did she eat ?"

If the answer was no, which happened sometimes, he always made sure she had a heavy breakfast in the morning, one she had to eat entirely if she wanted to have a break after her last course of the day. It only happened once that she was deprived of her playtime. Turpin knew it wasn't a solution to punish the girl when she didn't feel like eating, but she was so thin, even after two weeks of the best food that he was afraid to see her fall sick. Eating wasn't a pleasure, it was vital. 

"Yes."

The quietness of the maid made him suspicious. 

"What's the matter, Anne ?" he asked roughly.

The old woman wasn't impressed at all by the man. She wasn't afraid to stand up to him, even if she had already threatened to fire her or worse, to send her to a colony in the middle of nowhere in the upside-down. Perhaps the fact she had been his governess when she was a child had something to do with it. And even if she was grateful for the man to have hired her after her husband's death when he was still a young man, barely established as a young lawyer thanks to the influence of his family. 

"The girl is depressed," she stated frankly.

"Depressed ? We are not depressed at her age. She didn't know anything about the hardness of life," he prompted harshly.

"As you didn't know anything about it at the same age, I guess ?" Anne uttered perfidiously. 

The look Richard gave her would have made anyone else shriek with fear, but the woman didn't flinch under his stringent gaze.

"She is not mistreated here," he growled, his tone a dangerous warning.

"No, but she is alone. No friends, no toys, only studying the whole day."

And no father, she added for herself. 

"I've no acquaintance with child of her age," stated Turpin, "and for the toy, I'll leave money on the buffet tomorrow morning. Go into town and buy what you think is fit for her."

Anne shook her head with disapprobation.

"What ? Woman, do you want to live on the street ? It's where you would be if it hadn't been for my great kindness," groaned Richard, his patience thinner and thinner at each rolling eyes of the maid.

"The gift would have more valor if it came from her father," she simply pointed out. 

Richard, whose eyes were flashing with all his anger, hurried away to lock himself in his bedroom, slamming the door violently to let everybody know how angry he was in the whole house, but more peculiarly Anne, how displeased he was tonight.

The next morning, there was no money on the buffet, which made the maid smile. She was sure her words had reached Richard.

The day seemed to drag on for poor Catherine. She was too distracted to focus on her lesson, which annoyed her teacher who scolded her, promising her to give a report to her father about her bad behaviour. Catherine didn't say anything, even though she found it quite unfair as she just let her mind roam around. It wasn't as if she had disrupted the class by chattering incessantly. Anyway, except for the servants, there was no one to speak with. 

The second teacher was far more lenient with her, asking her why she was so lost on him. She shrugged her shoulders, but the man, who had three daughters and eight grandchildren, wasn't dupe. There was a heaviness in the heart of the little girl. He tried to incite her to open up, without success. He didn't insist as he didn't want to frustrate her. He understood that she was like her father : she didn't give her trust easily and the old man wasn't keen to damage the bond he had started to create with her.

At the Court of Justice, Turpin wasn't more focused than his daughter. He had adjourned the Court, even though he had found some pleasure in not temper justice with mercy. Anne's straightforward honesty had kept him up all night. He didn't know what to do. He didn't want to hurt the child, yet he knew he would if he was too involved in her life. He hadn't had any good role model and it wasn't as if he wasn't providing the child with everything she needed. But deep down, he knew it wasn't what she really needed. He had been a child too and back in time, he would have traded everything he had, money, wealth, high education, and the best tutors for the love of his parents. Or at least their care.

Her mother didn't have any maternal instinct. She had been married by force to a cruel man. She had given him an heir, then another one, who had died at the age of fifteen. His younger brother, more sensitive, more fragile, had made the terrible choice to stop breathing by hanging himself to the attic load-bearing beam. Richard was already studying in London when it happened. It's the butler who had found his brother and the boy had been buried in the highest discretion. No one knew the truth, except for the Turpin's family. Richard would never forget the belt lashes of his father when he had made him swear to never reveal the real causes of his father's dead. The truth would have disgraced the family. 

Catherine deserved better than the heavy Turpin's legacy. She deserved to be happy. And because he had been raised by the worst parents, he could be better. He knew everything he mustn't do. He knew how he could destroy her, therefore he knew how not to. 

He left the Court earlier than usual and well-decided to have supper with his daughter. Yet, when he arrived he found the manor too calm, almost as if everybody was already asleep. It was only five, so the venue should have been alive with servants accomplishing their duties, not with the distant cries of a little girl.

Turpin strode up the stairs, worried that something had happened to Catherine when he stumbled upon Anne.

"What's happening here ?" he asked roughly, "while Catherine is crying and where is everybody ?"

"It has been a tough day for the little mistress. Her classes didn't go well. Mister Wosley, her morning teacher had been quite hard with her. He wrote a rapport about her bad behavior, but the governess was with them and she assured me the little girl was quiet as usual, she was just not focusing on her lesson."

"And she's crying for a rapport about her behavior?" asked Turpin bewildered.

"She's afraid you don't want her anymore. The paper is quite severe."

"Because you read it ?" asked Richard, his eyebrows arched, the slightest annoyance on his face.

"No. She did and then she read it to me because she couldn't understand some words. I explained them to her in a more... soft way. I also assure her that you won't send her away because of the angriness of a teacher."

"You did well," said Richard absent-mindedly. 

He pretended to go to his office to read the note, but the maid retained him by clearing her throat. He turned around to face her, a questioning look on his features.

"What else ?" he asked, annoyed at his highest.

"This afternoon, she went out with Mister Brandon. He wanted a change of scenery to cheer up Catherine and..."

The maid hesitated, biting her lower lip.

"Anne, I'm tired, my daughter is crying which, I have to admit despite my disgust at doing it, distraught me, and I'm terribly hungry, which only add to my annoyance. If there is more, then speak without any diversion," he chided, his square shoulders and his stern eyes leaving no room for argument.

"Well, they found a strayed kitten and Catherine had brought it back. Mister Brandon didn't see the harm in it. But once he left, Harry, the stableman, told her that you didn't like animals and that you would probably throw the little pet against a wall to kill it if she didn't get rid of it before your return. She and her governess were trying to find an appropriate hideout for the little cat when she heard you arrived. Yet again, we tried with her governess to tell her you wouldn't do that, but she didn't believe us and now she's afraid Harry told you about her new companion while she didn't find anywhere to hide it."

Richard sighed heavily. The weariness and tiredness put a strain on him. 

"Thank you for telling me, Anne. Ask the butler to thank Harry with no money and reference. The boy doesn't work in my stable anymore,' and with that being said, and the package in his hands, he headed towards Catherine's room.

The governess froze when, after having closed the door, she turned around, almost bumping into Richard.

"My lord," she said with a curtesy.

"How is she ?" he asked, ignoring her terrifying eyes on him. 

"I managed to calm her down, but she is very afraid that you scold her or worse for what Mister Wosley wrote about her. She swears it's not true. And also..."

The woman wasn't sure she should keep quiet. She knew everything she had to about Turpin's bad temper and she had been here for only two weeks, also she didn't know if he could kill or not an innocent kitten.

"What about the cat ?" asked Richard harshly.

If he hadn't been so concerned about the well-being of his child, he would probably have found the expression of the governess hilarious. Her eyes were wide, she was gawking at him.

"Well ?" he insisted, "did you find an appropriate hideout for it ?"

"Indeed," answered the governess with embarrassment.

"Well, let's see if I can find it."

And with that being said, Richard knocked on the door, then entered without waiting for any answer, as he was sure the girl wouldn't have given permission to anyone to come in. 

"Catherine," thundered Turpin's voice, making the little girl shiver.

Her sad eyes looked upon his. He opened his mouth, but he didn't have time to utter any words that the little girls rushed into his arms. Flabbergasted, Turpin didn't know what to do and stayed stunned while Catherine flooded his golden waistcoat with her tears. 

"Come on, come on, calm down," said Richard softly, "let's sit down, yes ?"

He led her towards the huge bed on which were laying Merlin and many other plush animals.

"There's a whole zoo on your bed. Are you aware of that ?" asked playfully Turpin, hoping to ease a bit of the distress of his daughter.

It seemed to work as she giggled discretely. 

"Where do all those animals come from ?" asked curiously Richard.

"The servants," whispered the girl. 

Of course, they were all so fond of their little mistress, and apparently, they knew her better than him as everybody but he knew her love for animals, that they had spent some of their pay into expensive kids' stuff. 

"Do they all have a name ?"

Catherine nodded, introducing him to each of her unanimated friends with enthusiasm, her previous outburst forgotten. Even though Richard was happy to see the mood of the child liven up, he needed to clear up the events of the day. He cursed himself for bringing up the topic when she started to cry with violent sobbing.

"Hush, hush. I'm not scolding you, am I ?" he said, bothered to not know how to talk without causing anguish to his child. 

He, eventually, took his little hand in his, frowning at how thin her little arm was. He could see her bones protruding from her neckline and her shoulders and he was sure that during bath time, her maid could notice the same things with her ribs and knees. 

"You're not angry ?" she asked bashfully.

"No," said Richard.

And it was true. He knew quite well the teacher and how harsh he could be with his pupils. Yet, he was one of the best in his profession and Turpin wanted nothing but the cream of the top for her. He would have a word with him tomorrow, asking him to be more indulgent with the girl. He wouldn't have to ask twice for the man restrained his sternness because no one could match up to the anger of The High Judge Turpin. The Death's Judge. 

"Yet, I would like to be acquainted with someone else," uttered Richard.

Catherine still, understood he was talking about her cat. 

"I put him out," she declared too quickly.

Her alarmed eyes wandered a second too long towards her wardrobe. Richard stood up in a flourish and walked briskly to the piece of furniture.

"NO !" shouted the girl.

"Hush !" prompted Richard.

He sharply opened the door and a little ball of fur ran through the room to find refuge inside a cardboard box that the butler had given to Catherine for her new companion. 

"Well, it seems to already feel at home," stated Richard.

"Please, father, do not kill him," begged Catherine, bursting into tears.

Richard felt his blood ran cold through his whole body. It was the first time she had called him father. And if he was honest with himself, it had made his heart beat faster. 

"Never would I do something like that, Catherine," he said genuinely concerned she could believe him able to do something like that.

Actually, if Richard was totally honest, he could do that without any qualms to blackmail someone or to torture an enemy. But never would he do that to this girl who had become so precious for him in such a short time. Also, for Richard, animals were the sheerest and most beautiful of God's creation. Nothing to do with the mongrel he had to deal with in his day-to-day life. 

"But Harry said..."

"Do not listen to this idiot. Anyway, he doesn't work anymore for us. Rather than being gullible and believing everything everyone's telling you, you should learn to trust me."

She looked down embarrassed but Richard forced her to look at him by lifting her head with the help of one finger under his chin.

"What's the name of this little opportunist ?" he asked, looking with an amused look at the pet tearing apart the old blanket Anne had put into the box.

"Arthur," answered Catherine with a bright smile.

"Arthur ?" questioned Turpin.

"Like the King !"

Obviously. Merlin, Mordred, Gwaine, Percival, Leon, Elyan were the names of her plush and now Arthur, thought Richard, suppressing a laugh. 

"Well, Arthur is more than welcome in this house. As long as he doesn't dare come through my office and he doesn't scratch the sofas of the parlor."

Catherine nodded vigorously, her smile and the happiness flickering in her eyes a reward for Richard's tortured soul.

"I've also a present for you. I'm sorry it's not another beast for your zoo."

With that, he handed her the box he had put down on the nightstand. Catherine looked at the box with surprise before opening it with the enthusiasm of a child who wasn't used to getting a gift. Inside was laying the most beautiful doll she had ever seen. A porcelain doll with curly brown hair and the same green eyes as hers, like the one she shared with her mother. The doll's dress was made of real cashmere and embroidered with golden threads. 

"Are you happy ?" asked Turpin with trepidation as he didn't know how to interpret the child's silence. 

"I've never had something as beautiful before," whispered Catherine, not daring to take the doll out of her box, too afraid to damage it.

Richard did it for her, placing the doll among the animals.

"She will soon have her own house. I'm sure Anne and your governess would be more than delighted to help you to install her in her new lodgings. Perhaps you may ask Anne to teach you how to sew so that you could create a whole wardrobe for your doll. I will provide you with all the pieces of furniture you could need for this new entertainment."

The little girl, overwhelmed with joy, didn't know what to say and Richard, as introverted as his daughter on the field of sharing his feelings, told her he would meet her for supper. But while he was ready to leave the room, he heard Catherine's hurried steps running towards him. He didn't have time to turn around when a mass of brown curls threw itself into his arms.

He gently stroked her back with one hand, the other one caressing with as much love as he could dispense her hair. She finally stepped back, diving her green eyes in his hazel one without quivering at the natural toughness his face was constantly bearing. 

"Thank you, father," she whispered quietly, almost as if she was afraid of his reaction, afraid to lose the little affection he seemed disposed to give her.

Richard's face softened, his heart swelling with a feeling he hadn't felt for long. The last time, it was when Elena, his beloved Elena, was in his arms after he had made love to her. Elena had betrayed him when she had left him with no explanation. And now she was no longer of this world. But Catherine, the fruit of their love was there and she wanted nothing more than to love him unconditionally. It was at this moment, when he saw all the gratefulness of his daughter for a mere doll and his permission to let her keep the kitten, that a thought struck him. A man could lose a woman, but never a father could lose his child if he was able to be a good parent for the said child. So, Richard silently swore to himself he would be the best father a girl could hope for. From now on and until death comes to take him away from this world.

"You're welcome, daughter of mine," he said with a smile matching his daughter's one. A Turpin's smile. 

[iheartjameshetfield]

Okay okay I know I would kill for James and the urge to be his girlfriend is killing me but imagine being his girl bsf.

Like from kindergarten you and him where friends and now you two are inseparable. Just for him to be so comfortable around you makes me feel a type of wayyy. And you two tell each other like EVERYTHING.

Because your parents are always out of town, James would always come around to your house and stay for days on days.

(Like when you two are like 15 or something) You somehow manage to get alcohol and cigarettes. So you two would just get drunk to a degree and mess around in your back yard.

Like having that kinda friendship with James to the point where you are like brother and sister is so fucking cute like OH MH GOD SOMEONE HELP ME. 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

Someone send help this boy is too cute

NO CUZ IVE HAD THE SAME THOUGHT

like as much as i literally wanna marry this beautiful specimen of a man, just imagine being his best friend in the whole world.

you would’ve been there for all his shit and he would be there for all of yours. i feel like james use to be the type of person who didn’t know how to comfort someone that much, like he’d be more awkward ‘how do i stop her from being sad’ he would mean well but he just wouldn’t know what to do

but with you? god you’ve been friends for lord knows how long, he knows that he doesn’t even have to say anything. he knows that you just being in his embrace, hugging you for as long as you need it and him murmuring sweet words to you is enough. he knows that you’ll be ready to talk about it on your own pace. he knows not to try and give you advice. he understands that you just need someone to understand and hear you

during classes, you two wouldn’t even focus. you would just keep talking and talking, shit talking everyone you can, drawing the weirdest shit you can think of in each other’s notebooks or playing games like tic tac toe.

most of the time, one of you, if not the both of you, were asleep. you grab his wrist slowly to be sure not to wake him up and draw on his hand or write meaningless notes or insults on him. or when you’re the one who is asleep, he’d mindlessly play with the ends of your hair. i feel like he would also take notes for you if you fell asleep during smth important. you couldn’t even count the amount of times you both were late to class because both slept throughout the session, james’ back slouched against his chair while you rest your head on his arm.

he would alwayssss make sure to walk you to your class first, not caring how late he would be to his own.

sometimes, when you both were sooo done with school, you’d ditch. you would leave early and go back to your house. you would eat whatever snack you found while he shows you something new he learned on the guitar, or you’d both be in the back yard, listening to whatever was on the radio while you pass a joint back and forth, talking about whatever came to mind since there were no secrets between the two of you

james would teach you how to drive since your parents didn’t have the time. he’d make silly remarks, pretending to clutch onto the seatbelt harder than necessary as he prays to god to forgive him for everything he’s done while you tell him to shut up and not be overdramatic.

during prom, you were sort of down that no one had asked you, although you weren’t surprised since you didn’t really interact with anyone from your grade other than james.

to make you feel better, he would buy you flowers and ask you instead. he’d do the whole matching his tie with your dress and even pick you up from the front door like a gentlemen.

when you guys were in middle school, you started using this camera that you found somewhere in your house. you would take pictures of the weirdest things or take pictures of james during the most unusual timings. he could be opening a can of beer, or picking out a record, or even tuning his guitar and every three seconds, he’d feel you take a picture of him.

it annoyed him a lot at first, which only made you take more pictures of him, but after a while he got used to it. in fact, he enjoyed it and would sometimes use the camera to take pictures of you or the both of you together.

james sees you as his little sister, so he hates it whenever you’d wear something a little showy. whenever you’d go to a gig with him or a club or just anywhere, he always makes sure to stay close to you, chasing off any guy that even thinks about making a move on you. you get annoyed at him most of the time but other times, you were thankful. although you did find it irritating whenever he’d pull your shirt up or your skirt down or even giving you his jacket, telling you to cover up.

this picture of james is so childhood-best-friend trope i cant explain it, but he would totally smile this way with you only or when you tell him to smile big for the camera, he’d give you this goofy grin 😭😭

[dontexpectmuch]

hi!! firstly i just wanna let u know how much i love ur posts, you’re very talented n i enjoy ur work a lot !! id like to req a post about how jude would be when taking care of his s/o when they’re ill (i’m sick rn and its all ive been able to think about today lol) tysm in advance !! take care <3

you tiptoed quietly out of your room, trying your best to avoid drawing any attention to your movements. it felt like walking in a lion’s den, any noise and you’d immediately be noticed.

your eyelids felt heavy, your throat was itchy and your nose was stuffed, but you really wanted to make yourself some tea with honey and maybe grab some snacks. you were supposed to rest, drinking loads of water and staying in bed, but you really wanted to finish your essay, feeling restless at the thought of the deadline nearing.

“what are you doing?” a stern voice appeared from behind you, your plan of staying unnoticed going down the drain.

halting your movements, you turn around with a sheepish smile on your tired face, looking at your boyfriend whose body leaned against the kitchen doors frame. “hey, jude.” you greet him, eyes never leaving his face as he steps closer to you, arms on each side of your body, kind of caging you between the kitchen counter and his body.

“so?” he questioned again, tilting his head. his gaze was quite intense, you note, feeling nervous at his closeness.

“i wanted to drink some tea?” your answer sounded more like a question, fidgeting with your fingers and lowering your gaze to avoid his.

jude clears his throat, leaning back and crossing his arms infront of his chest, his eyebrows were drawn together, “babe!” he begins, voice laced with frustration, “i told you to tell me! you gotta rest, y’know.”

“but, jude, c’mon i’m bored! laying all day in bed with nothing to do exhausts me more than working.” you argue back, hands dancing around the air as if to highlight your point better.

“mum told me you need to rest.” jude reasons, grabbing your shoulders to lead you back to your bedroom, hands slightly massaging your tense muscles while he was at it. “i’ll get you your tea, babe.”

rolling your eyes, you sit down on your bed and look up at your boyfriend. he seemed pretty serious about his job as your caretaker, going as far as to ask his mum about how to take care of you, looking up recipes for all different kinds of soups and refusing to let you do any work, insisting that you should be resting as much as you could.

“shouldn’t you be at training?” you ask, leaning back on your hands, watching as jude lits up some candles that were in your room, mumbling something about setting the mood right.

“told them that there’s an emergency.” he replied, smiling at you. “can’t let my baby be all alone at time like this.” he comes up to you again, leaning down to press a soft kiss on your forehead.

“jude, that’s too much! you can’t skip practice because of this.” you scold him, face showing your disapproval clearly, “‘ts not even serious, just a mild cold.” shaking your head, you get up and walk to your desk to grab your laptop.

jude watches you, eyes narrowed, as you walk back to your bed and lean your back against your many pillows. “what are you doing?”

“working on my essay.” you shrugged. if you can’t do anything at all, you might just finish that annoying essay.

“nah, put that back, babe.” jude moves to take your laptop away, but you act fast and turn your back facing him, shielding your laptop from his hands.

“jude, please.” you plead, sighing. jude stemmed his hands on his hips, looking at you before he also sighed.

“fine, but you’re not leavin’ this room, ‘m bein’ serious.” he comes to a decision, watching you as you happily nod.

as you continued your work, jude went back to the kitchen to make you some tea and get you your snacks, talking to his mum on the phone at the same time to complain about your behavior, hoping she’d back his point up, to no avail, though, as she also believes that jude is slightly exaggerating.

you giggled at the sight of jude concentrating on bringing your tea, beverage filled up to the brim. he looked really cute and made you feel grateful for his presence and concern for your well-being.

“you’d make a good house-husband, you know?” you point out as he cleans up your desk.

“oh, shut up.”

———————————

i like y’all or wtv 🙄

[littledollll]

You can in fact get me something I desire my lovely, can I request a Larissa x fem reader fic? Your agere inagines are so cute and I was wondering if you'd write a caregiver Larissa fic, I feel like she'd be the sweetest ever and would constantly bring her little snacks and sit them on her knee, if you're comfortable with it, maybe reader is having a bit of a meltdown and needs some help calming down? ...and some snacks ofcs

Mommas here

Larissa Weems x little!reader

A/n: IVE BEEN WAITING!! Cg Larissa brainrot.

Warnings: snacks/eating, little anxiety, idk what else

You didn’t understand why you felt this way, a random pressure on your chest making your heart speed up and your mind run rampant and your breathing quicken. You started around looking for a distraction, something to get you out of this horrid feeling, it didn’t work. You needed her.

As you made your way into her office quietly you resisted the urge to run to her. What if she was too busy? Or simply didn’t want to deal with whatever you had? You quietly approached her, anxiously waiting for her to look up and take you into her arms.

The second she saw you Larissa knew something was wrong, not only did you usually try not to “bother” her at work, you looked about to cry, “Whats wrong, precious?” She immediately ushered you closer and pull you into a hug.

“I d-don’t know, I-“ talking started crying, words felt too heavy but you wanted to somehow explain, you didn’t know how. You simply clung to her as she drew patterns on your back. It was distracting, soothing and after a moment of your silence Larissa allowed herself to talk.

“Don’t force yourself to explain if you can’t. We’re okay my little darling, I want you to try and follow my breathing, focus on my hand as well.” She pulled you into her lap and you wrapped around her instantly, making her chuckle and kiss your temple.

Your cries turned into sniffles, and you rubbed your eyes hiding into her chest. “Mommas here, little one, it’s alright. Maybe we can try to talk later and figure out what happened to my precious little one, yeah?”

Her sweet words made you feel shy, “her precious little one” you giggled as you replayed them. “What’s got you so giddy all of a sudden?” Larissa’s smile was evident through her voice. “momma” simple enough reply, she responded with an exaggerated gasp. “Momma made her baby this happy? Oh my, what an honor!”

Giggling, you turned to face her desk, grabbing random things to fidget with. “Anything but the papers, darling.” You gave her a nod, grabbing one of her pens and taking her hand, laying it flat on the desk. You drew little shapes, the sun, some clouds, basically anything you could think off and was simple enough, Larissa allowed you.

“These are wonderful, my love! how about we get you something to eat and then you can go right back to drawing, little one?” You practically squealed at the mention of snacks, she allowed you to pick what you wanted from her stash. You happily munched on your food, completely oblivious to Larissa’s adoring gaze.

“Very good sweetheart, how about you stay with momma for the rest of the day?” She said as she played with your hair. “No bother?” You paused for a second, looking at her for confirmation, she gave you a reassuring smile.

“Of course not, my love. In fact it can get a little lonely here without you.” “I stay?” She nodded, stealing a piece of your snack making you gasp, offended. “How dares! my snack.” You huffed, crossing your arms. “Careful you don’t wanna drop it!”

“I’m very very sorry little one, I’ll get my own snack.” You shook your head offering yours. “Share!” She tilted her head at you. “Oh you wanna share? Thank you sweetheart.” “Mhm mhm, me n momma shares” Larissa kissed your cheek, holding you close. “I’ve got the sweetest little love ever, don’t I?” You very proudly nodded.

“I’m very very sorry little one, I’ll get my own snack.” You shook your head offering yours. “Share!” She tilted her head at you. “Oh you wanna share? Thank you sweetheart.” “Mhm mhm, me n momma shares” Larissa kissed your cheek, holding you close. “I’ve got the sweetest little love ever, don’t I?” You very proudly nodded.

“I’m very very sorry little one, I’ll get my own snack.” You shook your head offering yours. “Share!” She tilted her head at you. “Oh you wanna share? Thank you sweetheart.” “Mhm mhm, me n momma shares” Larissa kissed your cheek, holding you close. “I’ve got the sweetest little love ever, don’t I?” You very proudly nodded.

“I’m very very sorry little one, I’ll get my own snack.” You shook your head offering yours. “Share!” She tilted her head at you. “Oh you wanna share? Thank you sweetheart.” “Mhm mhm, me n momma shares” Larissa kissed your cheek, holding you close. “I’ve got the sweetest little love ever, don’t I?” You very proudly nodded.

“I’m very very sorry little one, I’ll get my own snack.” You shook your head offering yours. “Share!” She tilted her head at you. “Oh you wanna share? Thank you sweetheart.” “Mhm mhm, me n momma shares” Larissa kissed your cheek, holding you close. “I’ve got the sweetest little love ever, don’t I?” You very proudly nodded.

“I’m very very sorry little one, I’ll get my own snack.” You shook your head offering yours. “Share!” She tilted her head at you. “Oh you wanna share? Thank you sweetheart.” “Mhm mhm, me n momma shares” Larissa kissed your cheek, holding you close. “I’ve got the sweetest little love ever, don’t I?” You very proudly nodded.

[plum-at-sea]

ANSWER THEM ALL I NEED TO KNOW ABT HER NOW IM FONAN EXPLODE /hj

OMGHWIF THANK YOU MOOT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT ALL MY LIFE ILY

Meet my yuusona! original post

1. Name: Emery Sutton, some friends call her Em, Cater and Kalim call her Emmie, same nickname Floyd and Rook has for mc

2. Inspiration: None initially but she does remind me a little of Ariel and Ursula's human forms I might draw her in their dresses omg!!!

3. Age/Birthday: Since she's a freshman I just had her be 16 like the rest of them and she is a Scorpio born on October 24th (my bday :3) Treys birthday is closest.. literally the day after. Two parties in a row though that's fun!!

4. Dorm: She's in Ramshackle!!! Her and Grim had trouble with the ghosts at first but like canon, they eventually warmed up to each other and she has a lot of respect for them as people who have died. Her relationship with the ghosts is symbiotic in a way, they serve as security cameras and watch out for her and she takes care of and restores their home. Having to clean up Ramshackle made her learn a lot of skills and she could probably replace the roof herself. She also got really into interior design and woodshop so Ramshackle is definitely really pretty with her as prefect.

5. Class: Her and Grim are in the same class as Ace and Deuce and when they're not all goofing around, they can lock in pretty well and get work done. She always takes detailed notes in class solely because she can make the others buy them from her with snacks if they miss class or weren't paying attention.

6. Height: She's about 5'3 and is between Riddle and Kalim in height.

7. Hair/Eye color: Her hair is dark brown but sometimes I can't decide and make it medium brown. Her eyes are a deep blue and around her pupil, she has a sort of ring around it that's darker.

8. Homeland: Like mc, she's not from Twisted Wonderland but is in fact a Cali girl.

9. Club: I literally cannot decide what club she is in.. at first, I thought maybe the light music club so she can sing all my favorite songs but now idk, maybe she just has her own thing but I think she definitely pops in to hang out with other clubs when she's bored. She cant be tied down!!!

10. Subject: Her favorite and best subject is astrology because that's one of my special interests.. but she's also probably really enjoys history of magic too and flight class. Her and Cater definitely geek out about astrology.

11. Hobby: She really likes painting or just making little trinkets and jewelry. Everyone she's ever talked to has a friendship bracelet from her or like those string of beads you hang on your wall with a crystal at the end. She also really enjoys making snacks with Trey.

12. Pet Peeves: People walking slow in front of her and she HATES snoring and other obnoxious sounds. If you're at a sleepover with her and snore... expect to never wake up ever again, she will suffocate you with a pillow (/j). Grim is lucky he doesn't snore too bad or he would be sleeping outside. But Deuce on the other hand.. she makes him sleep in the farthest room from hers and puts a towel under his door.

13. Food: her favorite food is any kind of noodle and just in general Italian food. She really likes gnocchi and bread and yummy warm filling stuff. She doesn't care for steamed vegetables, especially asparagus and prefers them fresh.

14. Talent: She's actually a really seasoned oil painter and loves doing portraits!! She's not so good at painting landscape but that's something she's started practicing more often. Rook and Malleus probably appreciate her work the most and often ask to see what she's working on lately. Azul commissioned her to paint a whale for monstro lounge and wanted to ask her to paint him all cool and evil but was too embarrassed.

15. Unique Magic/Signature spell: Since she's yuu, she doesn't have magic but she is maybe a teensy bit psychic whether she realizes it or not. She has the prophetic dreams, is really intuitive and she can in some ways command other people telepathically if she's determined enough, like if she thinks "GET YOUR BIG HEAD OUT OF MY WAY I CANT SEE" and they get the sense to move over a little bit.

16. Quote: "Live you? Or are you aught that man may question?" To Malleus when they first met because she's been waiting forever to quote Shakespeare.

17. Personality: Pam Beasley. She can be kinda shy and awkward and not talk so much or she can be really outgoing and a chatterbox and like making people laugh. When she's warmed up, she'll be quick to witty retorts and teasing but most people's first impression of her is that she's a little timid unless her friends are giving her confidence. She loves working with Ace to pull clever pranks on Grim and Deuce and Sebek. When she's upset or angry though, she can be really firm and serious and maybe a little passive aggressive. Generally really friendly and generous and likes having fun. She's maybe in the middle of Lilia and Kalim personality wise.

skipping 18 lol

19: Favorite Housewarden: if she had to pick, her favorite housewarden would probably be Riddle just because they're the closest as friends and she really appreciates and admires his improvement as a person. They have tea at Ramshackle almost every week and just hang out #besties!!

20: Partner: FLOYD FRICKING LEECH!!! they met how canon mc and he did and started dating sometime after book 4. She likes the excitement he gives her and how cute and smart he is and how awesome he is and how sweet he is when he's nice, and he likes how resilient and caring she is and that she laughs and matches his energy instead of avoiding him. They're best friends that are practically engaged because things would be so boring if they broke up. Fit together like eels and shrimps. They're literally Johnny and Baby from Dirty Dancing.

thank you for blessing me with the opportunity to rant have this messy epel sprite edit of her

[the-stardust-shard]

What's it really like? How are the people in there? If you wanna answer I've always been curious cause Ive been told I should be in there

Honestly, it depends on your local laws / culture / country / region, but i’m in france so i’ll focus on my experience related to how it works here (incl. laws and such).

For reference, as of now i’ve done 2 stays, both of which were done in a private hospital and not a public one (which makes the experience itself vastly better by default, but still), and before my first stay in a private ward i’ve spent a bit of time in a local public one for single appointments (so no full-time admission but same grounds).

> What's it really like?

Boring. Mind-numbingly boring.

Your entire time schedule is strictly programmed so you spend most of your time stuck to it, waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting. i included below a photo of the schedule for here to show how much stuff there is inside.

A way i follow it to make it less grating is by noting down the “closing time” for each of those items, so i know when to come to arrive at the last minute when there’s little to no one left waiting, so i have the rest of my time free for myself or activities or whatever, but even then you’ll still have a nurse coming to check on you every so often and coming to berate you if you’re a bit late, so you’re always stuck to this stupid timetable.

time becomes so abstract that if you don’t have a personal watch / personal schedule for yourself, you always lose track of time or of the day. when on my first stay, i actually didn’t come with a watch (because my watch needs to be charged regularly and that’s done with a long power cable which is always confiscated) and until a friend brought one i spent my worst time completely lost and disconnected; i started noting down the day it was and how many days i was in on my hand to keep track of that.

that boredom always brings the worst, aka addictions to cope with that. cigarettes, soda, other binge snacking, and worse. if you’re in a group of people, you’ll often hear someone prompt for a smoke break. i didn’t smoke thanks to my husband bringing me my nicotine-free vape so i can have something to stim with, but i still drank around 100 cans (i have the number due to having collected all the caps) in less than 3 months.

a good thing is that it’s places with easy access to lots of other medical tools, so i’ve been able to see a few therapists, social workers, sports coaches, and that’s overall cool because it’s usually covered by the hospital where it would’ve been paid if i went to meet them outside.

A lot less waiting time and paperwork too, it’s handled for you, so it makes things less annoying to get going, especially if like me you struggle with paperwork and administrative bullshit.

as for the downtime between appointments / activities, it was filled with reading, listening to music, drawing, trading goods and services with other patients (yes, it’s one of the core components of psych ward), and once i felt safe enough to bring my laptop and such, watching series, playing games with other patients, etc.

my first stay gradually became better before the breakdown, but my second stay has been very isolated due to not finding anyone or any activity, so i’ve spent my entire stay reading books and listening to music in my room after having traded some snacks with some people who were going outside for the day.

the worst aspect for me was the food (an issue common with every stay tbf). as a vegan/vegetarian with allergies, i always got the most shitty and bland food possible (idk why in france they put meat in literally everything at every meal of the day), and that was actually what allowed me to leave the ward from my first stay; in less than 3 months i’ve lost 16kgs~ even with the snacking and the sport i did every day and i’ve been in tears at more than one meal due to how bad it was >> at this point i got used to not eating but it’s horribly bad and kinda scary for a medical site.

> how are the people here?

If i’m talking about other patients, the experience will be overall better imho. especially if you can find yourself a group of people in your age range or with similar experiences as you. it just feels.. a lot less judgemental and pressuring than outside. everyone’s fucked up in some way and nobody cares, we’re just here for the same reason and so we just hang out together and support each other when we can/want but even not doing that will not bring any judgement on you.

Staff is more awkward and uncomfortable, especially doctors and such (aka the ones with legal power over you) or administrative staff (aka the ones with power over the doctors and everyone else, but they’re so far up their asses in their comfy desk that they’re all always completely disconnected from reality, which makes their rare appearances very awkward and uncomfortable). On my first ward, i did find a few nurses that were pretty cool and with whom i’ve been able to have interesting or fun talk, but in the current ward i found no one, so the divide between them and us is really uncomfortable to handle.

in the public ward i went a few times for appointments (which was structured like an underground prison, full bars and all) though the med. staff was openly insulting of patients and such… i did witness and fight some shitty staff in the first ward too.

overall the staff is the most grating group, the one who can easily make the stay hellish and traumatize you even more if you’re not lucky.

still, among other patients i’ve been able to meet great friends with whom i’ve been able to spend a lot of good time even after my stay (one of those friends regularly comes to watch movies which we started on our stay, and the other is practicing tattooing with me, some others i’m still chatting with but don’t see as often though. these two specific people were pillars of mutual support during my stay)

you’ll note on the timetable below that it doesn’t even contain everything we need to keep track of in a day..

[atiny-piratequeen]

First off, I apologize that’s it’s been minute since I said a simple, how are you? Since all I’ve been doing is word spouting stuff about atx for the last hundred asks. So with that being said, Is your day going good? Hopefully someone not touching the sky with their age tries for you hand, it’s exhausting having only boomers hit on you right?

When I was working my last job, some of them found it quite delightful 😒😒 I was the youngest there and I will never not be traumatized about this one time this couple who worked we me both tried to go behind each others back trying to hit on me. I was so shook when I found out they were together 😭😭😭😭😭 I was like… nah fam I’m good.

Back on the atx note (sorry) but do the boys (those that don’t have a specific diet like jjongie) have any favorite meals, beverages, animals to snack on? And do some of them feed off of magical energy or emotions? (Ex: could woo potential feed off of cosmic or chaotic energy lingering in the air).

Its exhausting because im in a medical type job for these instances, you're expected to just smile and nod along and while i definitely do not do that shit, theres a limit to how rude i can be to defend myself. Which is ass bc i very much would like to tell them to go fuck themselves lmao. Yall cant even take care of yourselves and you got the unmedicated gall to hit on me??? Like ive had more sexual harassment in this place by mfs who are like. My grandma's age and that makes me wanna literally swallow a brick.

As far as how im doing aside form that...eh? Kind of stressing because ive been in a creative mood and i haven’t been able to get the shit i want done as fast as i want it done. Not to mention I've gotten back into drawing (Yeolanni's birthday is the same day as Yeosang’s and next week im going to be streaming with Penny and i want to have my avatars finished by time its stream time and im not satisfied with what i have so far). Im also kind of stressed because im cracking my ass to save for my car especially because i got this unfavorable time limit to get it and i feel like im getting nowhere.

That is,,,wild bro what the fuck?? This isnt rizz this is harizzment

Woo eats any and everything but he also a world eater. Piss him off? Chomp. Your planet is gone. Looking for something spicy? Swallow a star. Apparently it goes down like pop rocks.

Yunho eats souls but also people....mostly souls though.

Mingi goes hunting with San (the rare times the kitty comes out of the den without a fight), but he needs to eat bigger animals/monsters to even remotely get full. A party of dumbass human adventurers who think they can slay him to get his treasure works well too. They dont even get to see the twinkle of his treasure.

Hongjoong and Seonghwa eat your average seafood-based diet. With the occasional human thrown in the mix. Depends if we're in a silly goofy lil mood.

Yeosang is primarily one that feeds off of the energy of his forest. Thats why he can instantly tell when its disrupted. He also feeds off of fear (and joy but yknow)

[meeda]

I’m bored and not sleepy so i guess i better do a little health update

cw for body image and bad eating habits and self harming behaviors etc

the bad news:

I gained 20 lbs in 2 months lol, now I’m officially considered obese. Prior to gaining all this weight i had actually lost weight, a bit too rapidly, as a result of what may have been the early stages of an ed. but it quickly turned into frequent binging out of anxiety and boredom to overcorrect the starvation.

I’m still prediabetic. you’d think that this would be a wake up call to eat healthier and lose the excess weight but if anything this just made my eating habits worse. Ever since i got diagnosed with prediabetes, I’ve essentially given up hope. ive been hiding snacks in my room, eating at late hours of the day, and lying to people about what im eating. It’s like ive become ashamed of eating and turned my unhealthy eating habits into a secret… because that somehow negates the fact that im eating unhealthily?

I stopped binging just a week ago and went back to restricting. I know it isn’t good for me and I know I shouldn’t be doing this but I feel like I can’t control myself when I eat. This is the only way I can feel in control. I’ve resorted to drinking yakult for breakfast, coffee for lunch, and either fruit salads or chicken for dinner. it’s pretty sad. The silver lining is I started losing weight again. I know this isn’t the right way to go about it, but I’m so desperate to be thin again that I’ll eat the saddest little meals just to do it.

lastly, and this isn’t something I’m proud to admit but I began SH’ing again, and I don’t really plan to quit, so don’t bother convincing me to. I have managed to keep this hidden from everyone irl including my boyfriend. But I know he’ll figure it out eventually. I can’t wear sleeves around him forever, and at some point he’ll wonder why I’m avoiding intimacy with him. I don’t know what I’ll do when he inevitably finds out. It’s just a waiting game.

the good news:

I don’t know if being “in remission” is a thing for schizophrenia but I haven’t had any psychotic symptoms in months. I think I’m finally recovering after three years of dealing with this shit. If I can only convince my bf and therapist that I don’t need medication anymore, I would start slowly tapering off of it.

Despite my engaging and SH and dealing with weight issues, I’m actually relatively content with my life. I’m making gaming videos again, journaling, drawing, spending lots of time with friends, and even have plans for a trip later in the year. Things are heading in the right direction for me. I just need to get it together and stop turning to unhealthy ways to cope.

I stopped abusing laxatives, in fact I threw away the rest of them because they were shit (pun intended) for my digestive system. They did help me lose weight in the short term but it wasn’t worth the damage to my body. Part of the reason I’ve been drinking yakult again is to get everything back in working order. Idk if that’s how it works though im not a doctor lol.

[ekgpurplemom]

Koa 10 Hour IVIG

June 6th, 2023

Koa Green ITP 10-hour IVIG treatment

My day began pretty bright and early. I woke up at 7 am and left my room with my husband and baby still sleeping. I walk into the living room and my mother is laying down on the couch. She asks me if she woke me up and I say “No Mom, you’re fine. I just wanted to get up early for Koa’s treatment today and get some stuff ready.” She continues to sit for a few minutes more in an upright position. I know if I’m up she will be too because that’s just the kind of helpful woman she is. I begin to get myself dressed and cleaned up. I prepare a bottle of milk for my son. I pack things along the way…bottles, clothes for me and the baby, a bathroom bag, diapers, snacks, and toys. 

My son Koa has been diagnosed with acute (so far) ITP. Idiopathic Thrombocytic Pupura, but I have yet to hear a doctor say the long form of the disorder 😀. He is 1 year and 6 months old, he was diagnosed at 1 year and 4 months. 

The treatment that he needs today will last about 10 hours. This will increase his platelets for about a month and a half before he needs this same treatment again. That’s two hours longer than my husband's work day, I think to myself. However, I won’t be there alone with my child, my mother has come to help, and my husband will stop by at lunch and come back after work to finished treatment with mom. Once he’s out of work I usually tutor online for 1-3 hours each evening. For the last emergency treatment, I did cancel tutoring but this time, I will work around it. 

The IVIG treatment is gamma globulins, pharmaceutically made to increase the amount of platelets. This will be administered through an IV in his hand, arm, or foot. It can cause nausea, headaches, and irritable behaviors as well as fatigue. Also, my one-year-old can’t tell me if he feels any of that yet, so it sucks. 

I finish loading up the car. As I do so I think to myself it would be nice to have my husband there to help set up at first. But how could I ask him that? He usually arrives late to work from Koa’s blood draws which are each week, two last week when Koa’s platelets got so low. Then he also missed a day due to Koa’s emergency/initial diagnosis hospital stay. That first scare lasted three days and he received his first IVIG then.      

Plus my mom is here to help. However, by the time you park, unload, cross the Helen DeVos bridge, get your pass from the security desk (sometimes there is a line of people there, also waiting for their badges too), and arrive at the hematology/ oncology floor you are already 15-30 minutes late on a good day. So Mom and I leave and once in the car, she asks to stop for coffee and get me donuts for breakfast. I didn't budget time for this but oh well (7:45 am, we need to be there 8:30 am).  She is helping and I’m pretty sure as a mom with a toddler that late isn’t bad. Once in the parking lot, we decided to take what we can carry + the child also needs carrying, and get the rest with the Ozark wagon later.

As I said we have to figure out where we are going and then get the badges before checking in at the Hematology floor. Once there at the check-in we have to put cream on Koa’s arms to prepare for the IVIG and add bandages so the cream stays on. (In hindsight they go for hand or foot for treatment because the arm veins are usually so bruised after multiple blood draws. I will have to remember to do the hands and feet next time. So I don’t think this helped at all.) 

We wait a few minutes and then they call his name. We get vital done and then they show us his room for treatment. I am really happy when I walk in because 1. He’s needed this treatment for a while now. 2. He has significantly bad bruising and has 12k platelets (below safe level). 3. The nurses have put not one but two gym mats on the floor for him to play on! (I never knew I could ask for gym mats at his previous stay which lasted 3 days. The rooms and playroom are hard flooring and my son was just described as a fall risk)! (Ahh!)

However, from an online IPT Parent group I met the only other ITP mom in my city. She helped me advocate for my child. She told me about the cream and bandages and his play area by having me ask for the gym mat. 

The day before I was on the phone for about 13 minutes with the nurse talking about the specifics of his room and the layout to keep my hooked-up (IV) toddler safe. No easy feat.

I do highly recommend getting into an FB parent support group if you have a sick child. Don’t take everything online there seriously but if you can connect with another parent it helps tremendously even over messenger. 

While we are waiting for IV time Child Life come in to introduce themselves and suddenly we have a ton of toys between the ones we brought and the hospital toys. (Child Life workers are amazing hospital staff that helps advocate for sick children by being a support to parents and children.) 

FYI if you have a sick child in your family like this, ask the parents if you can stop by 30 minutes to an hour, it helps. Mom and baby/child see someone new and you don’t have to buy them anything. Just ask a nurse if you can bring the child some toys from their play area. Anything new to the child helps during a 10-hour treatment!

After 15-20 minutes it’s time to set up the IV. We are taken to another room Koa and I. Grandma doesn’t wish to see this part and I understand why. It’s not fun and it hurts. I find myself in this small room with my child and four other ladies. One is our outpatient treatment nurse, the other Child Life, and two are nurses or maybe phlebotomist, I’m not sure. Koa is on my lap and I hold him there while his arms, hand, and feet are checked for the best vein. He squirms and of course, detests this whole process. I have to continually put him back on my lap as he slides down. The first time they try to insert the IV the vein blows as they said and they have to try again somewhere else. Right away, petechiae appears on his arm around the site of the failed attempt. 

They finally establish the IV in his hand and the nurse puts medical tape and a shield around his hand. This took a book and two songs on the IPad to entertain my child. The Child Life worker helped keep him entertained. Still, he cries because an IV is much harder to establish than a blood draw. I asked the nurse why IV is so hard and she explained to me a little. A blood draw is just to take blood out of course but an IV enters a vein to add contents from the IV to the blood stream. So it needs to sit well and stay in. It’s hard as as mom when they are poking and prodding your child. Also a nurse had most of ther arm weight down on my child and it felt like she was pressing down hard on him to stay still. I told her not to forget that he bruises easily. ITP is rare they only have one other patient that lives in the city although more might come to DeVos for treatment. She listens as I speak and says “Oh yes” and then she lightens her arm on Koa. As a rare disorder mom you have to be a spokesperson for your child even amongst nurses. We get back to the room with nana. She talks to him. Then the nurse hooks him up. She gives him medication as well and says he will be asleep in 5-10 minutes due to the drugs. He falls asleep, but it takes quite some time the nurse enters and exits so many times. Child life stops in as well to see when we wish for music therapy to come in. We say later since he starts napping. As he sleeps I thank God for my child and plead for him to get well soon . Yet I’m also thankful that he is finally receiving the treatment he needs. It was a long battle to get approved from insurance but maybe more on that later. 

As he naps my mom is on the phone with my mother in law explaining what the treatments looks like and everything. She goes to the restroom to talk so she won’t wake up Koa. After her call, we eat some sandwiches and snacks from the nourishment area as he sleeps. When Koa awakes we are still going strong with the IVIG. He plays a little on the floor and we give him snacks. I place an online order for Zoup soup. My mom goes to get it in the few minutes the order takes. Dad visits on lunch to play with him and visit. I share my soup and treats with husband. Child Life comes in and decides to send someone later after family time. I crave in a snack because of the stress of it all and give Koa some snacks too. The nurse comes in to check on us and give more medicine. Koa acts a little suirmy and grandma holds him in the chair. Once his dad is gone I go back to Zoup because my mom didn’t realize she’d have to pick up my sweet tea from the cooler. Then I come back and see that Koa didn’t like me leaving but is happy I am back. I use the restroom and hear my mom reacting to Koa who has just thrown up. As I exit the restroom I see Koa has thrown up all over mom. She and him are both a mess. I hold Koa so she can clean up. He cries as fusses because he is messy and of course uncomfortable. She picked her shirt up so she wouldn’t drop all the gross stuff. She uses the restroom. I look at Koa and it is in his hair and on his IV and his clothing. What a mess! Mom changes shirts and I use the sink in the room to rinse his hair. We called the nurse of course to help clean nup. She has to change his medial tape and clean off his IV shield. Note to ITP moms, everyone needs a change of clothes that comes, just in case!

We get him all cleaned up and then Music Therapy with Child LIfe comes in. He is a little shocked at her at first, but seems interested in her guitar and musical instruments. I sing along as she starts with his favorite Wheels on the Bus. My mom has to leave as she cries a little after the first song. She comes back to sing and thank them. Then the nurse has to finish giving him the rest of his liquid medicine he refuses this terribly. The nurse tries, I try, then grandma tries and gets it down! He was screaming, crying and turning his face away every time we came with the little syringe. Towards the end Koa seems really irritable and crys/fusses a lot. We assume he’s going back to sleep with the medication the nurse gave him. He fights sleeping plays some more and then falls asleep. By time my husband comes back after 4:45 he is still asleep. My husband and switch off holding him, so I can go home to tutor online. We told the nurse ahead of time that I would switch with my husband. She asked if I could call the sessions off since Koa is in care. I said maybe but didn’t really want her making decisions for my personal life. Plus my mom and husband watch him while I tutor any other evening. I was there 100% of the time for the last one. Mentally I think it’s good to take a break. Let the other parent take some of the burden. I did 8 hour and husband did 2 or less. No that I’m comparing but having shifts just like the nurses do really helps out. Koa has two adults and that’s enough. 

Then I drove my husband’s car home which was an experience by itself and I taught online. An hour and a half later husband, Koa, and grandma arrive home.

Once we are all home together we are beyond exhausted. Then my husband assembled Koa’s  Cocomelon bed together the same night. Kudos to him! 

Post Care

The post care for Koa included taking pills for 3 days. Two sets of pills twice a day, one in the moring and one in the evening. It was also very rough getting the medication from our local Meijer Pharmacy because one was ready and technically he needed the unavailable one first. Then I call and tell them this and explain if he needs it twice a day he should get at least one dos by noon. The other medication they are out of and it’s clear there is some confusion about it in general. So the pharmacy and the hematology/ oncology team goes back and forth several times. Then I’m at the pharmacy and Koa can’t sit still. Then they inform me that the last medicine comes in a liquid but it’s too late the change it now. So yeah totally don’t recommend Meijer Pharmacy but what are you going to do.  You still need the medication at the end of the day. 

That’s a wrap. Or an unhooking as we could say.

PurpleMom 

#ITP awareness

Elyssa Green

[sesmantelar]

really thinking about the next stages of my life. I need to keep in mind that with whateer decision I make, that is not permanent nor is it the rest of my life and I can change things at any point. A part of me is very comfortable here in north carolina, and I really do want to keep it as one of my bases. the problem is, I don't have enough nor will I have enough money in time to deposit on a condo here. maybe if I can figure out my financial situation quick, I will be able to establish an actual solid base however, I need to get serious asap if I want that to happen.

I also need to remember that I can have my dollhouse and life anywhere - it's me that brings that energy and aura, not necessarily the location.

I want to get a new car. I think this is the year to do it as well because if I buy a new car like as my christmas gift to myself, I can work hard to pay it off in full prior to moving to europe, and then just have her shipped to whichever country I'm going to graduate school in.

I have an interview for another PRN job because I'm going to need my options lined up - and I want to be able to do overtime way closer to home (easier on me and my sanity, especially since it will be night shift work). I think the goal I will keep in my head is that if I can power through my online degree in the next few months as well as utilizing my overtime pay to compltely remove me from debt and get my savings up to where they need to be, I will buy the 2023 Mercedes GLA SUV for my christmas present to myself. it would be perfect! returning from my malaysia/japan trip and treating myself to my dream car! it will be such a proud moment for me because I never would have thought I would see the day. but before any of that, I need to check off the main requirements for purchasing her: get my credit score back to excellent, other than student loans take all my debt down to zero FAST, have savings up to 20k, be almost complete with my degree by january 2024, get an excellent score on the GRE, have an art business up and running, and submit art weekly to galleries as well as have neo and nova up finally, and be working towards your gold moves in the field by december. if all is achieved, trust and believe my beautiful (hopefully the rose gold!) mercedes will be under my tree this christmas. this is another thing im keeping to myself - love how I dont want to post my accomplishments anymore - I genuinely believe that the evil eye is real and I want no parts in negativity in my life.

outside of that, Ive been really inconsistent with my eating so starting today, Im doing OMAD and relying on low carb tea to last during the day, and the goal is to have a veggie/protein dinner once a day for nutrition and so I can start rebuilding my skating muscles/ stretngth. I have been a bit better about hydration, and I hope to make it habit that I will stick to again. the only thing I'm missing in this final equation for weight loss is exercise. if I start denying snacks again, finishing my fasts all the way through, drinking my iced lemon water (preferably up to a gallon), eating enough protein and doing the pilates videos I wanted to do, I know my body will come together in literally two weeks. I'm scheduled to leave work at 3 today but I'm planning on staying until 7 unless I really really want to go home at the end of the day. regardless, I have to use the time to stretch deeply, get my mobility back on track, ankles strengthened, muscles warmed up and ready for tomorrow. I'm likely going to get home, golden, do a pilates workout and stretch/do a mobility routine, do my evening self care, tune and practice the harp for tomorrow, and do the finishing touches on both drawings - submitting them to the gallery today, put all my clothes away, clean the entire apartment and do a quick mop.

at work today, I'm going to be studying for the GRE, reading a little bit of my book, researching more Swiss universities, and watching the business videos/working on my business stuff, rescheduling stuff that is happening tomorrow, and I want to start working on my colombia travel video. when I get home, I want it to be ice prep time, art time and harp time - as well as re setting my space. depending on how I feel, I may stop by the mall after work to pick up a new wall scent or candle because this mahogany taekwood wall scent does not smell appropriate for the dollhouse.

[anzu2snow]

Had kind of a long medical day. Had a full bone scan in Tacoma. Someone made an appointment with the infusion center at the same time I was going to get the injection. (Which was at 11:30am.) I normally get a CT scan on the same day as the bone scan. It has to have an IV, and the only way they seem to be able to do that is with an ultrasound from the infusion center. However, I was told I didn’t need an IV if it’s just going to be the full bone scan. I did not make that other appointment. I didn’t talk to them about it, and just went with someone that did the bone scan injection. That person thought I had a port for some reason. I don’t. The injection burned.

Afterwards, we went out to lunch. We were going to go to It’s Greek to Me, but it was closed. So, we went to Frisco Freeze. I only had their hot fudge shake in the past. Mom used to go there when she had treatments in Tacoma. I had their cheeseburger without onions with fries and root beer. It was smaller than I expected. Good, but not very filling. After lunch, we went to Half Price Books. I forgot to bring my books for it. That tower of books (that I was going to take there) is almost as tall as me. We got a chance to look around at least.

Then, we went back to the clinic where they did the scan at around 2:30pm. My arms started shaking, because of trying to stay in the position they put me in. They told me it was fine. Went to the lab afterwards to get my monthly blood draw. That hurt even more than usual, because it was the same vein they did the injection in.

After that, we went to Starbucks for snack. They messed up my order, but I eventually got it cleared up. Had a chocolate croissant and iced chai. It was nice. A little something to tide me over. Got home at around 4:30pm.

Got all my test results back already. Apparently my bone scan was similar to last time. It seems to be progressing in a few areas. My glucose is just barely within the normal range finally. My AST is still high, but a little lower than it has been. My ALT is high. It’s the highest it’s ever been. Something is still happening to my liver. There has been another symptom pointing to it. I need to bring this stuff up with my primary care doctor. It’s a little scary.

[spoopywhiskers]

I draw this whilst sitting doing this exact thing eating pretzels

Im glad ive been able to make the partial joke of im been doing x whilst eating pretzels all day, cause its true, cause thier the only fucking snack where you get a decent enough amount in the bag for the price that lasts more than 3 seconds....

Also, my brain continues to believe i can subsist on pretzels, carrots and kabanossi all day, but hey, they're safe foods i needed this...

When the music

[eddiesguitarpic]

HI OKAY YES I HAVE REQUEST—

poly!wolfstar, but they sort of have that casual dom/dom/sub relationship with gender neutral reader and after a super long day, reader is just exhausted and sirius turns into padfoot and remus is just smiling like an idiot as reader is just petting him n stuff!!! ive never requested something before so thank you!!! xx -jaylen

love this request :)

(not proof read, sorry!!!)

warnings: reader having a shitty day?? idk

You mentally curse yourself as you drop your bag, books, snacks, and crumpled papers clattering to the ground as students turn to look at the commotion.

Your cheeks flame as you hurriedly collect your things, stuffing the items into your bag before rushing off in the direction of the Gryffindor dormitories with tears welling in your eyes.

It seems luck wasn't on your side, your professor stopping you to lecture you on your poor exam grade. It only lasted five minutes, but it felt like eternity to you. You had to hold back tears the entire time, willing yourself not to have a breakdown in the middle of the hallway.

Finally, he lets you go with a clap on your shoulder with a good luck kid, and you're off. You're nearly tripping over your own feet as you jog down the hall, materials clanking in your bag at your fast pace.

You don't bother knocking, inviting yourself into your boyfriend's dorm before you could remember your manners.

Remus and Sirius are laid on the bed, the former reading a book while the latter rests on his shoulder, close to dozing off when the slam of the door snaps him to consciousness.

"Hey, darling." Sirius drawls tiredly.

"Hey." You mumble, kicking your shoes off while your bag falls to the floor when your shoulders slump.

"What's wrong, pet?" Remus questions, ever so observant.

"Not feelin' too good." You sigh, trudging over to take a seat on the edge of the bed, eyes trained on the splintering hardwood flooring.

"What's wrong?" He pries further, gently nudging Sirius off to scoot closer to you. His hand comes up to rest on your shoulder, thumb drawing circles on the clothed limb.

"Had a bad day." Your voice wobbles, the tears you had been holding back all day deciding to show themselves at the worst moment.

Sirius who had been quietly watching this entire time moves so he's to your left side, turning your head and pulling you into his chest.

You let yourself go, all the pent-up emotions and exhaustion manifesting in the hot tears rolling down your cheeks. Their hands on your skin feel like anchors holding you to reality, your mind and body overstimulated with stress.

"You know what they need?" Remus directs his question toward Sirius.

You pull your head from your boyfriends chest, looking between the two who are now grinning like idiots.

"What?" You respond.

"Padfoot." They answer in unison.

"This is nice." You murmur, hand brushing over Padfoot's thick coat.

"Always know how to make ya' feel better." Remus smiles, patting your leg affectionately.

You hum, letting your eyes fall shut as you relax into your boyfriends dog-form. He's soft, and warm, and you feel an overwhelming sense of comfort surrounding you. Listening to his slow heartbeat encourages you to let the stress from the day melt away, thoughts of only Sirius and Remus filling your mind.

You're snapped out of your thoughts when a big, wet tongue laps your cheek.

"Siri!" You squeal, pushing his face away as you burst into a fit of giggles.

He pants, almost looking like he's smiling as his black eyes meet yours.

His eyes are screaming I love you, and you hear it. Every inch of your being feels it, and you let yourself drift off with the reminder that at the end of the day, you will always have them to come home to.

And nothing is more comforting than that.

[angelcactus]

Tears To Shed

First fic! I had this idea in my head for a few days now and I wanted to write it! Ive been on the Davey and Angel brainrot for a day now so this is my first post! Be warned that inversion is mentioned briefly. 

Other than that its just Angel being somewhat vulnerable with their emotions.  

Angel never cried.

They never cried, not that they had the inability of crying; They just never cried. The only time they cried was during the inversion. Even then no one saw it. Angel replaced their feelings with innuendos and jokes, hiding how they felt. David noticed, of course he did.

Even when Angel was stressed or anxious about something they would find a distraction. Video games, snacks, TV, David. The list would go on. David had asked once and they just shook it off with an “I dunno, why don’t you know how to joke?” Followed by David calling them a brat and chasing them around the house as Angel giggled and let out a string of laugh filled apologies.

Until one day. David sat on the couch, his arm lounging off the side of the arm rest. He perked up at the sound of the door knob turning and the sound of Angel taking their shoes off.

“Hey Angel, how was work?” He asked, no response. His brows furrowed, they always responded. Angel just walked to their room, their body tense. David stood up and followed behind them. They just walked into the room and sat on the bed.

“Angel what's wrong?” He asked, sitting next to them. Angel just mumbled a small “Nothing”, not looking up from the floor. David frowned and carefully took their hand, rubbing their knuckles slowly.

“That's bullshit and you know it, what's going on?” He said softly, leaning closer. Angel rubbed their cheek with their other hand roughly. Their cheeks looked red. David pulled them close and tilted their chin up with his finger.

Angel had been crying, something they never did.

Their cheeks were red and their eyes puffy. They broke down in their car, and when they got home they had hoped that they looked ok, but they didn't feel ok. They felt horrible.

“Oh baby, what happened?” David said softly, gently cupping their face in his hands. Angel hiccupped and could feel the tears building up. “It's ok, you can cry I won't stop you, you have so much on your shoulders and you shouldn’t bottle that up.” David told them, rubbing his thumb on their cheek.

Angel whimpered and held onto his arms as the tears poured out, They hated it, but it was needed. They mumbled apologies as they cried and David just held them. They cried for almost an hour straight and within that hour David lifted them up and sat them in his lap, rubbing their back and rocking them slowly.

There were no more tears, just hiccups and soft whines. They hated crying, They hated feeling so vulnerable.

“You ok now? I'm not going anywhere just so you know.” David broke the silence, wiping the leftover tears on their cheeks, “you don't have to tell me just yet, I think you needed that more than anything.” He kissed their forehead. Angel nodded, slumping against him. They tugged on the back of David's shirt slightly.

“I got your shirt all wet,” They sniffled and laughed softly. “I knew it was made of boyfriend material.” They joked, wiping their face.

“Good to know you're better now.” David smiled and kissed them gently. “I mean what I said, don't hold shit in, Angel. It's not good for you and I think you've known me for this long that you know I kinda like having you around.” he smiled at them.

“Oh so you can make jokes.” Angel laughed, “Thank you Davey” They smiled resting their head on his shoulder. “Does crying normally make you this tired? Good god.”

David hummed in response, “Not usually but you needed that.” he rubbed their back, drawing small shapes in their shirt. Angel nodded.

“I love you” He said, definitely not drawing hearts into their back.

“I love you too Davey”

[tteokdoroki]

— “SHARING IS CARING + DABI/TOUYA TODOROKI.” ft. shoto todoroki.

author’s note(s): i havent written in days bc ive been working on other things but here’s this bc i am a whore. btw reader and shoto are third years/18 in this so hold onto your wigs lol.

warning(s): mdni, 18+. smut, dark content, dub-con, manipulation, cheating, choking, breath play, unprotected sex, exhibitionism, voyerism kinda, corruption!kink, virginity loss, degradation. characters aged up to 18. fem!reader.

touya todoroki has always been better than his brothers, at everything. praised from a young age for his powerful abilities, handsome face and charming smile— touya is the todoroki family’s prized gem. the favourite, prodigy son. the one who always gets what he wants. of course, until precious shoto todoroki arrives.

shoto, the undeniably gorgeous boy with dual chrome eyes and hair to match— an aloofness about him that draws everyone in, especially at school where he excels and wears himself at the top of his class in U.A academy. now; he’s everyone’s favourite boy, endeavour’s, his mother’s and yours. you, the sweet and innocent little girl who lives about two blocks away. the whole neighbourhood knows who you are, the apples of your cheeks stretched into a darling smile, that’s sometimes etched with an air of shyness when someone compliments you on how pretty you are.

you have doe eyes that watch shoto with such awe because you’re so impressed by what he can do, because you love how kindly he treats you and how he protects you from hungry stares belonging to others. touya finds your innocence annoying; the first time his younger brother brings you for dinner. the way you stutter over your words when speaking with rei or enji and how hide behind shoto whenever the eldest enters the room.

but you’re nice to look at, he can see why his pest of a younger sibling keeps you around. does shoto realise how far your skirt rides up over your ass whenever you bend over? how your thighs resembling pillows spill over the tops of your school socks? and how your lips are always so bitten and cherry red— everything about you is so fuckable.

and like i said, touya todoroki always gets what he wants.

“i’m better than him, aren’t i sweetness? you like the way this cock fucks you. c’mon, tell me how good i make you feel.”

touya doesn’t really need an answer, especially when it’s unlikely that he’ll get one from you. pretty little girl, sweet ass up in the air and raw from the onslaught of spanks he’d given you earlier. your cunt shines with a slickness he so proudly knows that he’s caused and your hole puckers around nothing— so eager to be filled by the eldest todoroki’s cock. “t-touya, need you. p-please...” you babble, clawing at his black linen sheets, already stained with nectar from your leaky cunny.

oh you’re so good, so nice for him when you’re fucked dumb and on the edge of frustration— you say just what he wants to hear, so eager to please that you’d beg him for days if it meant you’d get your pussy abused and used. “that’s right little girl, you need me, right? ‘cause lil sho can’t take you the way i do. you need me to show you what it’s like to feel good.”

touya lives for the way your hips jump back from just his dirty words alone, clit pushing deliciously against the tip of his length— you’re so cute when you want it. when you wanna be fucked by an older, more experienced dick. you know that touya has what shoto doesn’t. you know you can always rely on him to make you cum when shoto can’t.

any decent older brother would feel bad for taking advantage of his sibling’s girl, but touya has a point to prove. he’ll always be the better todoroki, he knows that, especially when his burning cock sinks into your tight hole— the one that welcomes him into your velvet walls, so perfectly carved into the shape of him.

a drawn out and gargled whine bubbles in the back of your throat, the stretch making your eyes roll so far back into your head touya would have thought you’d passed out, it wouldn’t have been the first time either.

oh no, he remembers the way he’d made your fleshy thighs quiver and your meek voice turn to screams when he’d taken you in the bathroom across the hall from shoto’s bedroom the first time you stayed the night. or the time that he’d cornered you in the kitchen while you made a study snack for you and your boyfriend, carelessly flipping your skirt up and creaming in your virgin cunt until all you could say were mindlessly repeats of his name. touya. his name always sounded so pretty against jumbled words that slid across your tongue.

that one time in the kitchen, touya had sent you back to shoto’s room with your pink lace panties full of his pungent seed and had listened to shoto fuck it deeper inside of you later that night when you let the younger take you for the first time. touya wonders if his little brother truly believes he was lucky enough to take your virginity or if he knows how much of a whore you are for the eldest, white haired sibling. possession flares in his chest at the very thought, making him plunge himself into the deepest parts of you while you quiver like a little bitch below him.

his piercings drag up and down your gummy walls, friction causing you to drool amongst the pillows that you drown in. touya’s large hand pushes down on the small of your back, shaping your body into an uncomfortable arch— you whimper but don’t complain. taking his dick like you should, accepting him like you should. his balls, oh so heavy with cum, slap against your cheeks while your juices paint his tummy from how much you leak and the lewd sounds fill the air so loud, there’s no doubt poor little shoto todoroki can hear it through the walls.

“sweetness, you’re so bad— sneaking off to let your boyfriend’s big brother make you scream. you’re just a slut for the todoroki dick...aren’t ya? you’d probably let nat in on it too...” touya slurs, drooling at the way your backside bounces with every slam of his hips into you.

“n-no-! no... ‘m not a slut...not a—!” you squeal pathetically, barely able to finish your sentence as touya shoves your face into the sheets harshly— deep chuckle reverberating in his chest as he presses it to your sweaty back.

you still yourself, taking all what he gives to you even if it means you can barely breathe. the eldest todoroki lifts a hand to knock on the thin walls separating him from his little brother; words coming out as breathless as he thrusts into you deeper, harder, faster— abusing your barely prepped hole. “ya’hear that sho, yur lil angel’s not as innocent as you think; she’d let all of us fuck her if we asked nicely...” the way he speaks about you is mean; it could make you cry but all you do in response is clamp down on the man above you and suck him in deeper, selfishly just like he’d taught you. he smirks with pride at how much your cunt lives for him, at how his little brother is getting the show of his life time— probably jerking off to the sounds of his girl getting railed but someone who isn’t him.

touya’s hips stutter and he cums inside you with a shout, thick ropes of his hot seed spraying against your walls and seeping between your puffy folds. ringed fingers find your clit, drawing circles into them until you tip over the edge and tumble into your own release, clamping down so hard that you draw blanks from your boyfriend’s older brother. the way you twitch after touya’s emptied himself inside you, letting him press down on the sweet bulge at your tummy so his cum leaks out— almost makes him want to brush the hair away from your face and kiss you, but he remains objective— treating you as proof that he will always be the superior sibling.

when he’s pulled out of you and helped you to shaky legs to leave— he watched the regret wash over your innocent features like it always does when he’s made a woman out of you. “tell my little brother i said; sharing is caring, sweetness.” touya asks of you oh-so-kindly, revelling in the way your bottom trembles and a fresh set of tears well in your bambi eyes.

what? he couldn’t lie and say he didn’t mean to make you cry, but that would defeat the purpose if he was telling the truth.